Top 5 Ways (this past week) I Am A Questionable Mother

5. Have started using my yoga mat as a place to let Peanut feed himself. He has started insisting on feeding himself and I am not willing to clean my old school, needs to be resealed (or sealed to begin with?) hardwood floor that often. I sit him down with his breakfast... a bowl of oatmeal, or cereal or (this is a memorable one) 5 frosted mini wheats + 3 baby carrots + one strawberry and let him go to town. Then I put him in his morning bath (yes he has 2 a day) and let the dogs in to lick up the yoga mat. Should that be a different entry? Using your dogs as an honest part of your clean up routine? Oh no, that's on the Top 5 Ways I'm A Bad Housekeeper list.

4. Have given up on the 'Don't eat dog/cat food' issue. It was my red button, makes me so irritated I could demolish a building issue. I have admitted defeat. "Fine, Peanut! You want to fill up on dog or cat food? Go ahead! See if I care! But I'm telling you kisses on the mouth from this mom are going to diminish significantly"

3. Give my child lemonade. Apparently it's worse than soda on your kids teeth because of the citric acid plus sugar. Just kidding, I just only had 4 blaring example of inept mothering this week but a Top 4 list is stupid.

2. Have started insisting Peanut spends time outside in the backyard without me. What? 17 months old is too young? Don't worry, he has 3 dogs (the smallest 3 times his weight) out there who alternately knock him down and lick his face, thus knocking him down, to watch him. Also we have one of those dog water, hooks onto the spigot, looks like a hamster water things out there and I've totally caught him using it so I know he always has access to liquid refreshment.

And the Number 1 Way I Am A Questionable Mother...(try it in story form)

1. Let's say L has put on her calendar that Friday she will get out of the house (without using the car) with her fussy baby, NO MATTER WHAT. Living in a town with no sidewalks (ok there might be some but they're definitely not by her house) taking the regular stroller is quite a pain. But wait...we have a bike trailer that, with the addition of one wheel, turns into a jogging type stroller (bigger wheels= easier on rough streets).

Except one thing...L can't find that one wheel. One grumpy phone call to husband later, tire still not found and L is close to losing her mind. Why? Well, the road from normal L to losing-her-mind-L is not a long one. So she decides to just take Ox's bike with said trailer attached.

Problems with this? First, Ox's bike was a special buy made to fit Ox. It even says the word "Giant" on it. Even with the seat all the way down L can't reach the pedal at it's down position.

Second, L honestly hasn't ridden a bike farther than 10 feet since elementary school. This is no joke. Not a huge fan of bike riding (seriously, all these years later and they can't figure out a more comfortable seat?) L has avoided biking most of her life. When is a good time to rekindle your interest in something and try it anew? Well, it's definitely not when you will be riding on the street, pulling your baby behind you, with his life in your hands (or just dependent on feet that can reach the ground without laying the bike over sideways).

Does L contemplate all this? Not really. So she starts on her bike ride. It's easier than she thought, besides the part where you have to give it an extra push at the 90 degree point in rotation so the other pedal comes around to where you can reach it. L is starting to feel pretty good about her self and this idea. Then comes the slight incline, and the railroad tracks. This is more aerobic activity than L has done in a while. Also these seats really are uncomfortable.

Ahh here it comes...the stop sign. L is aware legally she should stop but since she can't get off the bike without holding onto something or kindof dropping the bike sideways and jumping off she decides to skip it. Her pulse accelerates contemplating a oncoming car or even a cop but luckily she lives in a podunk town with not many people cruising around in the early afternoon. A not long time later L arrives at the park with Peanut, who seems unaware his life has just been gambled on. A phone call and two short trial trips later, L and Peanut resign themselves to waiting at the park for Ox to get off work and pick them up.

 


And there you go. Has my almost year and a half of motherhood imbued me with a maternal instinct and a lot more common sense? Not really. I don't want to scare you not-yet-parent types but parenthood only seems to increase your ability to be stupid and/or questionable. Should my Peanut survive to adulthood you may all remind him what a close call it was.

Favorite Author Fridays - Walter Dean Myers and Sharon Creech = Love That Dog

I've been trying to decide who to write about this week and I had almost decided on Walter Dean Myers except I haven't read enough of his book. I've read a lot of his books but he's written way more than just 'a lot'. I feel I can't do him justice until I read a few more of his books.

But I was thinking about him quite a lot so I decided to write about a book that mentions him and is written by Sharon Creech, another great young adult/children's author.

Love that Dog by Sharon Creech is a book I would recommend to everyone!!! It's a book in free form poetry about a little boy who doesn't want to write poetry cause that's a 'girl thing'. He is then surprised to find out that the journal entries he's been doing are poetry. They're simple and beautiful (and if I taught Elementary or Jr. High kids I would for sure read this book).

He eventually writes a poem called 'Love That Dog' modeled after Walter Dean Myers' poem, 'Love That Boy'. We get to meet Walter Dean Myers in the book and I can tell you I have seldom been so excited to meet someone in real life.

Anyway it's a short, easy read and teaches poetry and how simple it can be. In school I always hated the poetry sections because although I didn't mind reading poetry, I HATED writing it. I never felt like mine was good enough. This book would have helped me to feel differently.

Favorite Author Fridays - Holly Black

Sorry I skipped last week- it was busy! Anyway today's author is Holly Black.



I decided to talk about her since Nate and I went to see the Spiderwick Chronicles movie last night. I'll be honest, I didn't love it. I don't usually love movies based on books I've read or actually even reading books I've seen the movies of first. This movie left out a lot of the intro stuff that makes you love the characters. Even Mary Louise Parker couldn't save it for me and I love her in a not quite platonic way. I just didn't care about the family and wasn't even very caught up in the action. Sad for me. :(

However I did really like the books. I loved the style of them (similar to Series of Unfortunate Events) where you have small hardbound children's books that are just a little nicer (and more likely to hold up) than the average children's book. I have also long been a fan of her older young adult fiction. I really think that is really her strength: gritty modern realistic fantasy. She excels at showing teenagers as they quite often are, well-intentioned but making stupid choices. They are however very questionable. She did not choose to write about the average, mostly boring, lives of the teens you probably know and love. She chose to write about teens in bad situations making really dumb choices and encountering magic in a modern environment. If you have big concerns about the material you allow your young adults to read these are probably not the books for you.

But I do love them. I love her realistic characters and her portrayal of modern life meeting magic. She does it beautifully. And I especially love that her protagonist are not always right and good. They are often wrong and stupid- very much like us.

Here's her Bibliography. Ones in red are ones I have read and recommend.

The Modern Faerie Tales

• Tithe : A Modern Faerie Tale (2002)

• Valiant : A Modern Tale of Faerie (2005)

• Ironside : A Modern Faery's Tale (2007)

The Spiderwick Chronicles

• The Spiderwick Chronicles: The Field Guide (2003)

• The Spiderwick Chronicles: The Seeing Stone (2003)

• The Spiderwick Chronicles: Lucinda's Secret (2003)

• The Spiderwick Chronicles: The Ironwood Tree (2004)

• The Spiderwick Chronicles: The Wrath of Mulgarath (2004)

• Arthur Spiderwick's Notebook of Fantastical Observations (2005)

• Arthur Spiderwick's Field Guide to the Fantastical World Around You (2005)

• The Spiderwick Chronicles: Care and Feeding of Sprites (2006)

• The Nixie's Song: Beyond the Spiderwick Chronicles (2007)