Dear Work,

You told me when we changed my position from part time to full that if we needed to change it back later we could. You lied.

I talked to my supervisor, she talked to her supervisor. I was going to go back to work part time. I went into the 'firm up details' meeting to find out the next supervisor up said full time or nothing. The feeling was 'shut up and be grateful you have a job'.

Guess what???

No job is worth me being away from my Peanut 50 hours a week (working and driving). We'll do what we can to make the money work. I will see my baby grow up. I will be there for all the important milestones. I will NOT spend 80% of my working time working just to pay child care.

Nehemiah 6:3

And I sent messengers unto them, saying, I am doing a great work, so that I cannot come down: why should the work cease, whilst I leave it, and come down to you?

Overwhelmingly Irritated

It all started out as something simple- it was time to buy the new parking permit at work. They don't start selling them until July 20th (and the old ones expire on the 31st) but last year they had a grace period of 15 days if you had the previous years permit still on your car. So I didn't stress much. Plus I was waiting for payday on the 31st to get one.
Anyway so I get online a few days before to make sure all is well and find out I can't buy one online since I have a Bursar balance. That's fine. I make plans to stop by on my way home on Friday night and pick one up, but then Friday night rolls around and we have a thing to go to so I just race home and figure I'll get one sometime on Monday. I park in my normal area on Monday, go to work, work from 730 am to 430 pm and then go to my car. I've gotten a $35 ticket. Seriously???!!! Well, I figure I'll just go get my permit and talk them into lowering my ticket.
I get to the parking office and there am told that I can't buy a permit at all while I have a Bursar balance. Please let me know what having a bursar account and buying a blasted parking permit have to do with each other! I can't even just outright buy a permit with cash or bank card? I have to go through the Bursar? I was starting to get really frustrated at this point. I might have actually said the words, "that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard". The young man told me I just needed to pay my bursar balance. Note: If I had the money to completely pay off my bursar balance wouldn't I have already done it? They also wouldn't do anything about dismissing my ticket until I paid my bill and came back. How I'm going to manage walking to and from way off campus parking to work each day at 8 months pregnant with a pulled tendon in my leg I'm not sure.
My next great idea was to have my sister Amber buy me a permit on her account (she just started working here at the university) but I discovered each employee can only buy one permit. My frustration is over whelming.

Hot and Fat

Ok so I feel like I've been ranting a lot lately and I swear it's less out of anger and more out of laziness- I can't get up the energy to write unless I'm really irritated. So if you're tired of my whing-iness feel free to skip this post, I won't be offended...

I am all about people not judging so much on looks. As you can tell from my previous entries I don't think anyone but your doctor, and possibly a very brave spouse, should have anything to say about your weight ever.

I grew up with a naturally skinny mom who made tons of comments about my weight and how she wishes I had gotten her skinny body type. I remember a time when my friend's step-dad made some comment about me being fat and when I told him to shut up my mom took his side and told me I couldn't see my friend again until I apologized to him (this was the first big example of my stubbornness being way greater than my mom ever expected- I never did apologize to him and my friend and I are still very much friends). I remember an aunt sending me a letter my first year of college telling me she had seen recent pictures and to watch out, because I was getting really fat.

Guess what...none of these comments ever made a difference on my weight. I definitely felt worse about myself but I didn't get skinnier. The skinniest I've ever been was when I worked hard to eat good food because I liked it and I found exercising I enjoyed. I didn't weigh myself and I ignored every comment made to me about weight or my looks- even by well-meaning friends/family. I was at my healthiest and happiest.

Note to well-meaning friends/family: You're don't help. Fat people know they're fat. There's a reason they're not skinny. It could be laziness or glandular or snacking or hate of exercise etc but they know.

However to get on with my hypocrisy I share the following:

There's an older lady at work I really struggle with. She talks loudly and constantly. She has to 'know' everyone like those people in LA who always 'know' this or that D-list star. And I'm constantly having to listen to totally inane stories about her kids's finances, her husband leaving her several years ago and then coming back, the food she ate, her 2nd job work schedule etc. She drives me crazy!

The other thing she constantly complains about is the heat in the office. The lady behind me has a space heater under her desk year-round, all the other women wear thick sweaters and I wear a sweater daily and have a blanket on my legs. And yet she complains about how hot she is. Guess why she's hot??? Because she's fat. She has plenty of insulation to keep her warm while the rest of the office is freezing.

That is my hypocrisy. Every time I'm wrapped up (while pregnant mind you) in a blanket and sweater at my desk and she complains about being hot I want to tell her to either shut up or lose some weight.

Now I know I'm a bad person and now you know I'm a bad person but somehow I feel better.

Cub Scouts, Training and My Crazy Ox...

Well a few quick updates.

I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but I work with the Cub Scouts (in the Wolf Den). They're so cute! I just finished my first year with them (I actually came in part way through this last year). I had 5 boys this last year, a couple of them with some extra needs. It's nice to have gotten to a comfortable point with them. At first I was really nervous; I am the oldest of 4 girls and NO boys. And honestly, 7 year old boys are a little gross. But overall they were great and I'm really grateful for the time I got to work with them. Here's some pics of me and 4 of the boys from last year.


Here's the scenery they made for our skit we did. They did awesome!


PS This year we just started I have 6 boys...oh the fun!

Next...

We'll most of you probably know I've been working at the same job since January of '07. Just this August they made my position permanent (I had been full-time temporary the whole time before). I now get benefits and leave time etc. Really nice!!! However it did mean I had to slow down my schooling again. It's crazy- I'm starting to feel like I'll never be done.

Anyway, even after all this time working here I still had to go to orientation. Luckily a co-worker, Kendall, also had to go- and he's worked here even longer than me but just got hired back as full-time permanent. Anyway it was pretty amazing I can tell you. Here's a pic of us before our brains melted from inactivity.


Last but not least, this is what happens when Nate gets a hold of my camera...