Pregnancy Milestones III

Oh yes they're coming quickly now. Milestones to mark all the beauty and absurdity of growing a parasite you one day hope will behave rationally and take care of you in your old age.

1. Can always feel at least one part of Peanut through my belly, he's like a hard, constantly moving tumor.
2. Watched Orgasmic Birth. Made Nate watch it too. Great footage of happy births, overuse of the word 'ecstatic'.

3. Attended my first birth class at the hospital. Soon to be parents: there may not be such a thing as a stupid question but there is a stupid time- 2 weeks before your baby is due seems a little late to be learning basic biology. However to be fair, I'm glad you're at least putting in some effort at the end.
4. Have become the "cautionary whale" (name that movie!). Seriously school is about to start and looks of joy and knowing from mothers and grandmothers have been replaced by looks of fear and pity by co-eds. Yes dear, this is what will happen to you if you continue to get smashed every Thursday night at the local bar and go home with anyone. Remember this body when you look at yourself in your bikini this weekend and STAY SOBER!

5. Finally warm regularly. I am no longer freezing while in my office all day. Tragically I am now getting hot very easily when outside.
6. Had numerous dreams where Peanut is born, we play with him and then put him back to finish 'cooking'. Currently jealous of marsupials.

7. Tried on 3 shirts this morning before I found one that didn't show the bottom of my belly.
8. Wearing flip flops to work. At the point where my feet get hot and are swollen by the end of the day if I'm not careful, so have taken to wearing flip flops to the office- just try to say anything about the dress code!

9. Made Amber push me around in a cart at Walmart cause my feet hurt...dared workers to say anything...almost got stuck in the cart when I realized my balance wasn't up to me getting out without over-turning the cart.
10. Can eat sweets again!!! I knew it would eventually happen. Now to convince myself every urge for ice cream doesn't necessarily need to be satisfied...

11. First bouts of acid reflux. Leave room for my stomach, Peanut!...and the ice cream...
12. Took a bath while Nate was gone and then honestly thought I might not be able to get out of the tub without help.

13. Started making family talk to Peanut before they're allowed to get off the phone with me- you can't hang up on a pregnant woman!!!